Infuriating as it seems, do you think your kids are not listening to you when they’re asked a question? Rolling their eyes when you ask them to do something for you becomes a dire task. It’s the classic behavior that kids go through as they get older.
From 2 years to their teenage years, their behavior changes due to the onset of physical and psychological growth. The sense of self is working into them. Truthfully, if kids are taught not to listen, they won’t listen. Listening is considered to be a learned behavior according to psychologists of child development. They should be taught to listen before their toddler years1..
Ages and stages
Between 2-7 year olds, speech will become their social skills phase. They are less egocentric and there are still tendencies to concentrate on only one object’s element simultaneously ignoring all others. While concepts are crude and irreversible, they tend to believe in what mirrors fantasy and not reality, at times.2
The “tendency to ignore” everything is a basic strategy called the selective deafness. Child psychologists say it’s a way of testing the limits between child and authority, in this case the parents. Infused with impendence, the method of dealing with new pressures and responsibilities are normal for kids. Since they are at home, or with their families, kids tend to be more relaxed, casual, and even a little lazy.
Yet, it does take time and above all, lots of patience to keep kids in line. They do know what’s important to you. Certain factors have to be considered. First, reminding them that they live under your roof is stating the obvious. They know homework, house chores, eating meals, and hygiene are on the top of the list.
4 simple ways to get your kids to listen is normally a learning process, again. It may help the entire family to try out, these four tips for some simple techniques, for a couple of weeks. It could take weeks, months, even years for both to acquire the habits mentioned below.
- Overwhelming words, giving an overwhelming chore-list is not feasible to kids that are not willing to listen or actually wanting to do them. They need age appropriate duties, first of all. They may understand the English literally, but they do not comprehend what most parents are trying to say to them. So, by writing it down on a paper, such as a chore list, you may be able to get through. Maybe an allowance at the end of the week will help when the list is complete.
- By concentrating on other things and people…a kids concentration span are notably less than zero to, umm, nothing. They are fad and friend-focused. Some even think about sports and school. Naturally, what they are thinking about is literally not what their parents are saying to them. The outside world is not even there–to them. With the latest in technology gadgets, their eyes are fixated on their video games, iPads, cell-phones, and computers. Also, they are very well tuned out when at home. With that in mind, do you think parents’ communication skills are fading away into space? Parents should not fear. The reason has to do more with their physical and chemical attributions while developing as a child.
- Negative words kids would rather block out; parents often start their words that can trigger a negative connotation to kids. For instance, words which begin with you, or no, not, don’t, can’t …etc. can trigger words that will halt the listening automatically. Straight dead in a parent’s eye. Sometimes without the parents knowing they have been cut off by their kids cold shoulders, it’s already too late.
- Positive reinforcement encourages children to be disciplined and follow requests much quicker and with positive results. Positive talks reap positive communication. And if “breaking the rules” means punishment, then praise is encouraged for flloowing them. Reduce attention-seeking behaviors by rewarding with a reward system. For instance, the most common one is the Sticker charts. They work well with the younger kids. It is also one of the best methods for disciplining a child[ren]. Reward systems can help turn around behavior problems fast.
Finally, by regaining control of your kids listening skills, teaching how to respect their elders as well as their teachers, they should respect authority, if need be. What is for sure is they understand the English speaking terms. Even if they don’t understand what is being said most of the time, they will be prepared to withstand any order given by their teachers and, especially, their parents these signs of the times.
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